nothing like sitting around a campfire until all hours of the night! Skeeter (minus his gal), Scooter and Stretch and I camped out. I bought this modified tear drop trailer because tents are not me anymore. very comfy. but no room for Stella. She slept with Skeeter and Butters and cried all night. Other than the killer heat index it was much needed fun away from home in Gods country aka my 40 acres in the woods. The dogs cooled off in the creek. We took nature hikes. We ate walking tacos. YUM!!!
Sunday LDP came over and brought all the fixings for roast beast. All he needed was an oven and cutting board. I hooked him up. My chili was already cooking. He told me he had won a chili cook off and his secret ingredients were cinnamon and chocolate. Okay…. I thought about it. My sons are very picky and love the way I make chili. I went for it. I could definitely taste the teaspoon of cinnamon and thought oh, oh. While things were cooking we played Wii. He had never done it before. It was fun and really, what else to do for entertainment? I guess I was at a loss.
So, the boys show up and Skeeter tastes the chili and mentioned tasting cinnamon. Well, uh, must be too much “powder” again? I fessed up. He ate it. I sent home most of it with the guys and saved some for lunch at work. Yum. Sitting overnight, it really bought all the flavors together and there was no hint of cinnamon. Of course I always crush up a ton of crackers and everything tastes better with cheese.
Back to the subject…LPD drank lots of beer that night and we had already planned on him staying so he didn’t have to drive 45 minutes home. I told him if he behaved he could sleep in my bed. He hesitated a bit, offered the couch (which is like sleeping on the floor with a steel bar stabbing you in the back). In the end he behaved himself quite a bit and although there was a hint of… well I told him I wasn’t gonna do that. And no, it didn’t happen. I keep my thermostat at 60 degrees while I am sleeping. It felt like 160. That man sends of big time body heat. And we were both dressed in sweats head to toe. HOT as in sweaty all night. Not a whole lot of sleep that night for all the wrong reasons!
So we emailed back and forth and he thanked me for having him at PC and mentioned being available for the weekend after next. This next weekend he has his daughter and invited me to go sledding and to a movie. The thing that bothered me was he pretty much said the WHOLE weekend when he didn’t have her. Well, anyone who knows me, knows I cannot be smothered and having someone here 24/7 for the whole weekend wasn’t going to happen. I mentioned something about not looking for a f-buddy but a committed relationship.
Then came an email that confirmed what I had been thinking. He does want to see me (his exact words were, just what I have been looking for) but went on about the future and he wasn’t willing to move here and etc etc. Hello. It’s all a bit premature anyway. Hell, I have only seen him three times and that was spread over like three months.
So, I told him (via email because of the hearing loss thing), that there would be options down the road IF and WHEN we decide to be a committed couple. And if he is just looking for someone to screw once in a while there are most likely alot of women on that dating site looking for just that.
He makes a killer roast beast by the way!
…it’s really hard to get out of bed. Other days, I just want to hate him and get on with my life. Today, it’s hate big time. Friday will be week number 4 since I have returned to PC. I really hope the break downs are done. Yesterday was a bad one. Because of the email he sent, telling me he thought about me on Mothers Day (which was also my birthday), hoping I had a good day and commended me on the good job I did raising my sons.
I have all but given up with that stupid dating site. Maybe the men contacting me have good intentions but my trust is 100% gone. gone. gone. One guy seems nice but desperate and lonely. I do not want to be smothered AGAIN. And I really don’t need a man who is unemployed. Curious if some of them are really retired. I heard of one that claimed retirement, younger than me and found out he was on disability= fibromialgia. Please.
So…I give up on love. I have all I need. Guess I will look forward to summer and sprucing up PC. It could use some.
My Skeeter and his girl are house hunting. Not sure if they can afford it but I wish them well. They need to be together and get the extra dog out. Can’t wait until PC is mine again. I am kind of tired of sleeping in the spare bedroom on a twin size bed but it was my choice. I want my bedroom back. And I have a HUGE ass TV in my living room. Scooter won it. It needs to go.
I looked out my window last night and saw a huge black bear crossing the street headed to my property. I panicked. Do I call animal control? Next thing I know he’s licking blood off my deck, from my sister whom he had just consumed. Then it smashed through the slider and I am out of control yelling at Scooter and Skeeter to GET IT OUT OF HERE. I hide underneath a table in the corner. Then I wake up.
What does it all mean?
I fell in love. Hard and fast. I moved in with him. A week ago last Friday I got home from work and he told me he wanted his life back. Up until then I thought I was his life. He admitted he was selfish. He apoligized. He tore my heart to shreds.
I am now back at Poverty Corner, licking my wounds trying to get MY life back. When I moved out Skeeter and his girlfriend moved in to PC. Now my life is over crowded with dogs and people when all I want to do is crawl into a corner and be alone to heal. They will be moving out. I am going through enough. So I suppose I am selfish too. They haven’t even finished their unpacking yet. I feel so bad.
I have been rather busy. Falling truly, madly, deeply in love with the man of my dreams. Yes, D has indeed captured my heart. We have been together almost nonstop since Jan. 29 at 6:38 pm. (He called me to let me know he was going to be late). He calls me all the time just to say “Hey”.
After years of dating I have found my perfect match. I am so totally wowed by this man. Funny thing is, he has lived less than 7 minutes from PC for the last 2 years. And although I will miss PC- hell I have been here for over 26 years, we have made the decision that we can’t be apart and I will be moving in with him soon. Very soon. My oldest son Skeeter and his girlfriend will be renting PC. Until then we pretty much hang out at PC right now, more convenient work wise. He has his own business and his schedule is a bit later in the day, so he leaves here and goes home after I go to work. He sweeps the snow off my car and shovels the walk before he goes. He loves to cook and we spend alot of time cooking together. He feels guilty if he doesn’t take me out on the town, always asking “are you sure you don’t want to go somewhere”? and I tell him I don’t want to go, I just want to stay home with him and he loves it. At this moment he is practicing with his band. The only time we are apart other than work. We are so smitten with each other. He took me to a job Saturday and I was his assistant as he measured the home for weatherization. Later we met my sissy and her hubby for dinner and then went to Minnards to buy windows for his next project. He teaches classes to help people learn how to save energy in their homes. His house is small. He has spoken of adding on. It’s too early to make decisions like that.
I know one thing. We will be spending a great deal of time on Lake Michigan this summer. He has a boat. It sleeps 4. One of the things I love about this man is that he has not sat idle. He built his house and has all his boy toys. He only needs me in his life now.
He just called. He will be here in 20 minutes. Swoon. He is just as crazy about me. No doubts. No fears. True love. Life is great.